I sit ten feet from a co-worker who won’t shut up. She talks and talks and talks. About nothing. Then she goes from desk to desk reading book passages or telling a story that starts off with “Back in 1938 we didn’t have Twitter.” I turned to my other co-worker and whispered “Who the fuck pulled her string?” Sometimes when she talks it’s like coming into the middle of the script. I have no idea what she’s talking about. Today she was on repeat and the fifth time she told me something I wanted to scream “Calm your tits.” I have no idea what that means but wouldn’t it be lovely to tell someone to calm their tits and they have no idea what that means so they shut up. For a few minutes.